If a close friend betrays you horribly and then attempts to win you back by sending gifts without any sincere kind of apology, isn't it just another admission of guilt on their part? How would you respond?

I hate when people try to "buy" me off.

Answer your question with another question. Would you be friends with someone just because they bought you gifts?

I'm more insulted by it than relieved honestly. When I got the package in the mail, I was really so sad the entire day just reliving the memory of what happened and how much it utterly broke my heart and destroyed my sense of security with that person.

I'm not leaning towards forgiving them or even talking to them. I just dont know if I should mail these things back or just keep them and not talk to him. I am interested in what you all think.

When I said insulted, I meant that a present doesn't really fix anything. If he had admitted what he did and understood why it was so terrible, then I would have been more open to an apology. The problem was, he didn't even really apologize. He more complained about how his life isn't the same without me and how he thinks of me all the time. It all seems really selfish to me.

Gifts can be part of a sincere apology, but not a replacement for one. Send them back.

@Mattycakes: it may be possible he is trying to do that, but i think given our years of friendship, he would be able to do so with an email or text as opposed to presents. there certainly is this "being bought off" kind of feeling to the situation. at least to me.

@Eva: Send the gifts back without having to actually contact the former friend. Ignore them, just cut that person out of your life until they can be sincere with a real apology. If that day never comes, hopefully, you'll have forgotten about that person by then.

Truthfully, once someone leaves me with that sense, it's hard for me to ever really forgive them and I tend to see any faux apologies as backpedaling.

shove said gifts in their butts until they apologize or until they poop a fruitcake.