Once more and yet again, I find myself trapped by the oppressive weight of my best friend's unrequited love.

ew.

Oh life is so hard.

the ew was sincere. i've had the same problem.

libi, I know you're sincere and I love you for it. My patience is just totally tapped from dealing with people shitting up my internet.

it's terribly dismaying when they start to do that. i am so very glad that my one completely absolutely best friend and i had a phase of being in love with the other at the same time. and then moved on to deciding we're better off as siblings.

The heavens must surely have smiled upon you for that. I seem locked in a cycle of tension and drama and awkward, whimpering death.

oh.... that makes sense

that's why you gotta rememeber that most guys wont be friends with a girl unless they fancy them and think they're gonna get more

most, not all

@sally: see, i don't think that is true at all. i think the problem ones are the ones who grow to fancy me after being friends with me for a while. the ones who fancy me to start with i can generally turn into friends who have no interest in me romantically by being, well, my generally unappealing self.

See, I always thought that spending enough time with me would convince a person they'd never want me as a girlfriend. But all too often this does not work.

Filing a third vote against the evil that is the romantic comedy.

I'd offer hugs, but it just seems woefully inappropriate.

does that ever work? does anyone ever fall for someone because of their persistence? i've never had a friend say "well, i wasn't into them at first, but they wouldn't leave me alone, like at all, and now we're getting married."

and i'm with libi, the people who start out with romantic intent can be migrated into the friend zone, its the friends who decide to get all romantic that cause the problems.

That's too bad about your friend, but it is true that men will not invest time and energy into being friends with a woman unless they think that something will come of it.

And that was the most articulate 'fuck off' to the peanut gallery. Brava.

I have no opinion on this topic, but it amuses me.

On rom-coms: One of my friends always wanted to say about the girl that he married that they got together after he finally broke down her spirit, like in the movies.

And I remain convinced that I can and will have platonic friendships, with heterosexual men even.

It's not hard to have friendships with people of the opposite sex. You just need to make damn sure that they are fully capable of realizing when a person isn't interested, and then taking that knowledge and looking elsewhere.

So basically, don't be friends with losers of the opposite sex. Because they'll see you as their "one chance" because you are the only man/woman who is willing to have anything to do with them.

At least thats been the way to catch 90% of them in both my, and my friends experience.

romantic comedies are to blame. . but so or some of our mothers for saying "you have to be friends with them first"

Having been on both sides of this equation, it's best to break away, be it temporarily or permanently. And if he becomes "just another guy you knew," then maybe it's for the best for both of you.