So far my guesses for the fakes are:

I really don't think Liza is anyone

I am going off of what Carlo told me. He knows her better than I.

Why would someone send me their waay past due phone bill as proof of residence when applying for a loan?

my guesses are
Linda Busser=Hena
Midget Frank=Carlo
CAPTAIN HAMMER=I really have no idea

I thought Hena for LB at first, but I would rather believe everything I'm told and assume it's Val or her boyfriend.

What ever happened to Letty? I liked her, sort of.

@nammy, I can see how that would be, but usually we get bored of something a lot faster than that. Besides, I mostly use GTI from work and the way they have the proxy set up makes it really hard to sign in and out of places.

GINGER, WHY DO YOU DOUBT ME? YOU'RE ONE OF THE AWESOME PEOPLE, LIKE ME. YOU TOO ENJOY PUTTING PEOPLE IN THEIR PLACE WHILE PUTTING ON A GOOD FACE FOR THE CROWDS. I KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS. REALLY. IT'S EXHAUSTING TO SMILE TO THE CAMERA WHILE SEEKING OUT EVIL NON-CONFORMERS AND RIDICULING THEM. THIS IS WHY YOU'RE A FOUNDING MEMBER OF TEAM AWESOME! YOU SHOULD FEEL GOOD ABOUT THAT. NOW GO HAMMER SOME MORE DWEEBS!

Of course you do. This sort of thing makes you feel better about your many insecurities.

@MIDGET: ONCE AGAIN, IT'S NOT HER FAULT. SHE LIKES GUNS AND TROLLING BECAUSE DADDY DIDN'T GIVE HER ENOUGH ATTENTION AS A CHILD. ISN'T THAT OBVIOUS? DON'T BE AN EVIL PRICK, MIDGET FRANK. ACCEPT HER FLAWS AS AWESOMENESS AND YOU TOO CAN BE REHABILITATED!

They tried to make me go to rehab!
I said, "No, no, no!"

@bizzy, I'm bored enough to spend all day at work watching the anon thread and spamming for your karaoke votes.

Ginger: Yeah, there's not much future in being a coke whore, is there?

@GINGER: NO, BABE, THEY'RE WITH DADDY. TRUST ME. GUNS ARE PHALLIC. I KNOW ALL ABOUT PHALLIC. I LIKE TO HAMMER NAILS, YOU KNOW? YOU JUST THINK THEY'RE ABOUT YOUR MOM BECAUSE YOU WERE IN DIRECT COMPETITION WITH HER FOR DADDY'S ATTENTION, AND SHE WON. OR MAYBE SHE DIDN'T? YOU KINKY MINX!

BUT NOT TO WORRY. I'VE GOT YOU UNDER MY WING NOW. YOU'RE WITH CAPTAIN HAMMER, THE MOST AWESOMEST OF THEM ALL! NO ONE WILL DARE CALL YOU A VAPID BITCH ANYMORE AND GET AWAY WITH IT! I PROMISE.

My parents were separated, though. YOUR LOGIC IS FLAWED AND I AM LOSING MY FAITH IN YOU.

BABE, I ALREADY SAID MAYBE YOU WON. WHY DO YOU THINK THEY GOT SEPARATED? YOU WERE RIGHT. IT *WAS* ALL YOUR FAULT. DON'T LOSE FAITH.

Or something.

if val truly is linda busser that's like epic beyond epic

OH HEY VAL

What really sucks is that I had an idea for the most awesome best sockpuppet account ever, back before Linda Busser, but I was lazy and never got around to making it, and now Linda broke character and the other new sockpuppets are fucking stupid, so it would just be dumb. Ah well