I really hate the Dominique Swain/Jeremy Irons version of "Lolita." Bad bad bad casting and stupid directorial decisions.

Woah woah.

You take that back.

Man, I wish I was James Mason!

I mean, did they have to pick an underage chick who looked like she was 18?

Did "Lolita" have to act like she's mentally deficient rather than a child?

WTF was up with all the porno ass shots? Yeah, H.H. is a paedophile, but he likes childish sexuality, its cruel artlessness and unself-consciousness! This wasn't it, and I resent being subjected to adult-porno-style objectification for no reason. (Why the fuck was Lolita lying under the sprinkler in that stupid see through shift? What kind of child does that? That looked straight outta the pages of Penthouse, and I did NOT want to see that shit. Anyway, H.H. isn't into barely-legal round asses. He's into sapling-like legs and slightly knobby knees, tanned arms and scrapes near the elbow, careless play and insolent innocence. Not the imitation of adult sexyness on a young girl. The movie really had no idea what it was doing.