Ok, go to this site and submit a message.

I really wish there was a pill you could take to melt the fat away.

I think that my boss is being all buddy-buddy with me because he saw that my old design firm is rehiring for my old position.
Little does he know, I saw it too and I am TAKING IT BACK!

haHA!

"O mother, O mother, come sit you down by me,
Come sit you down by me and pity my case:
It's of a young officer lately deserted,
See how he has brought me to shame and disgrace."

"O daughter, O daughter, why hadn't you told me?
Why hadn't you told me, we'd took it in time,"
"I might have got salts and pills of white mercury,
But now I' m a young girl cut down in my prime. "

"O doctor, O doctor, come wash up your bottles,
Come wash up your bottles and wipe them quite dry,
My bones they are aching, my poor heart's a-breaking,
And I in a deep solemn fashion must die.

im annoyed at you fucks who ride your bike around with your pants rolled up and take seemingly endless breaks and yet apparently dont live in the street and can afford burritos every day. fuck you and, where do i sign up?

If you love ginger, set her on fire.

=o

"David needs to grow a dick."

HIGH FIVE

you all need to learn about portion control

Haha! The porcupine one was mine! :P

knotty cur is one hot hot hot man. i wish liza hadn't tainted him cos i'd bone him 10 ways til tuesday.

Manuel is perfect and everyone should love her.

"Tiff IS a real blonde, you douche."

ROFL.

@sven: Ah, who the hell. Sorry you got that one.

i'm gonna get a mustache ride from cheech

tiff's carpet matches her drapes. maybe the only pubes ever to have roots.

GUYS, WHAT THE FUCK

Due to improper activity from your computer, access to this server has been banned. If you feel this is in error (and it may well be -- believe me, this server is cobbeled together something sloppy), please contact the webmaster at smalltime dot com.

@sven: It's still workin' for me.

Oh yeah, it bans you if you say FAGGOT or anything. So you gotta say FGT.

all i said was that CHEECH DOESNT HAVE A MUSTACHE ANYMORE, DOOFUSES.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRANDIDIDIDIDIDIDI!!!!!!!1111

ok i got it working again.

"nothin lasts forever "

I just can't quit you!

Stop! No... no, wait. That's good. That's... no, seriously, that's enough for now. That's enough! Stop it! NOOO!!!!

Corey hasn't been laid since 1995.

Johnny has a freakishly large head. That's why he hides it.

These aren't your grandparent's American Gladiators!

Really, I don't know what else to come up with.

Does anyone else think Previous Toast is a gloriously self-righteous tool? I know I sure do!

"She's at that point where she can call me and say, 'Hey Dad, what's up? What time are you going to get me?' It's really cool. We talk every day. It's hard for me to be the tough guy with my daughter. Maybe I should work on the discipline stuff, but I could leave her mother to do that!… Look at me and the way I live: I ride my bicycle, I walk, I don't have a driver. That's how I keep her grounded. Her mom does a good job too – she's not that person that everyone thinks. She's very laidback and cool." — Carlos Leon on his relationship with daughter Lourdes, aka Lola.

No heterosexual man should wear hotpants and yet...

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

Stop talking about your penis and your head, Johnny.

wow, you people are fucking ADD. slow down a second, jesus.

El Indio: I'd hit that.

"If you are not too long, I will wait here for you all my life."

HAHA johnny you keep getting mine

well, Oscar's I mean.

Is anyone gonna write a letter to that 789 guy?

Manuel likes to keep photos of chickens in her nightstand.

" Does anyone else think Previous Toast is a gloriously self-righteous tool? Yes, yes i do. Signed, El Indio. Tool might be a bit strong, though."

Osdihfaskadsjl I DO think about Patrick Duffy and it's convenient because my boy's name is Patrick so I can't yell out the wrong name.

I used to not like El Indio but i pretty much friggen LOVE HIM now. Call me.

Patrick Duffy thinks about Tiff's boyfriend while he's fucking her mom.

My fiancee finds weird websites...like me...how did you find this site?

"You are responsible for your own happiness...
I dream in turquoise blue and cerulean colours...dream a little dream of me.
Hey blue here is a song for you..."

you're a weird website?!

that *is* weird.

This page makes no sense to me. What is the point of this? You don't care what i'm writing - i probably won't care what you write - what is the goal?

I hate Des. Anyone else? She is so overbearing and rude. Remember when makelikepaper was so interesting and independent and fun before she started hanging out with Des?

i am an alcoholic - what a shame. don't drink!

It seems that the most insecure, histronic, self absorbed scum are on the Internet.
Nobody cares about your knowledge of indie bands, no one cares that your taste in movies is the most superior. No matter how many times you complain that it is there, not their, someone will make that error... Probably to spite you.
You are pretentious. Your attempts to sound smart are feeble.

"The world is filled with polite, shy, inscrutable, unintelligible, tight-lipped, superficial, dishonest and also honest people who for one reason or another do not say what they think. The search for freedom of speech has barely begun. Many do not reveal their thoughts because they are not sure what they think. Many would be braver in their speech if they were more certain of a sympathetic hearing. Many, particularly in places where success depends on conformity, are schooled to be hypocrites. The hidden thoughts in other people's heads are the great darkness that surrounds us."

Read more: http://www.oxfordmuse.com/selfportrait/makeportraits.htm

I would totally have had sex with you that night when you stayed over and we cuddled, but then it would just be weird, but it might have been amazing too so who knows. Some things are just not meant to be. We are always orbiting each other like two planets but we never intersect. Why? I wish I had the answer.

I'm going to kill a mouse ever time I see ginger make a post.

"Celisse needs to get laid. Maybe then she'll stop being a pretentious self absorbed little bitch."

Oooooh, angry.

Don't dish out what you can't take fuck face.

Hello, I'm in love with you.

What I wouldn't give to make Damian Lewis mine. DREAMYDROOL

My finger is in my panties. Right now.

"Tiffany, Celisse, and Carlo are interesting about 50% of the time."

"Carlo's face looks like someone ran him over. "

I'd punch Celisse in the face.

Where did my new ginger (the hair color, not Ginger here) obsession come from?! I used to hate gingers!

I want to bend Tiff over the hood of a cautionary vehicle.

I predict Agent Lover to be the one to read this.

WRONG

"Johnny, you don't need the quotes. Also, I want to operate heavy machinery."

Ok, I just burst out into giggles while trying to do an insurance verification when I read that cautionary vehicles thing.

BEN IS GONNA DELETE ALL OF YOU!

"Yay for GTI celebrities! "

i do not!

@Phro - 20 bucks that was Corey.

My hand is moving up your thigh.

Sometimes I want to kill you all.

You know you all could pretty much say anything now and just blame any wrong doing on the anonymous message generator.

Is it sad that I actually like small cocks? I like them because they fit in my anus. xoxo Tiff

There's an elephant in the room!!

Sorry, you're wrong. Libi's hot.

Opposed to the large cocks you can fit in your anus, Corey?

I hate it when guys shave their heads.

TOTALLY TOTALLY AGREE WITH THAT ONE.

Libi would be hotter if her attitude wasn't so awful.

Des has every STD in the book, folks.

(Jesus Christ people!)

"This site makes me sad."

I have a crush on Celisse. I think she'd be sexy riding me.

Carlo begged to fuck me.

I actually kind of admire you. How's that for nice, you pussies?

Lots of shit talk about me going down. I don't think it's tiff or celisse. They generally have the balls to shit-talk to a person's face. Hmm.

I totally have the hots for Tiff's millipede.

dude speaking of keys, can i tell you people that i friggen left my keys hanging on the front door all night? DANNY HAVOK COULD EASILY HAVE ENTERED MY HOME AND KILLED ME!

"Is it weird that I feel left out because no one has been talking shit about me in here yet?"