I tried to use a trashbag as a condom for my huge dong, but it was too small. What should I do?

Drink some vodka, put the bag on your head, and take a nap.

Have that shit cut down, damn.

@CM- Codename: The Batcave

And, you know, Mace.

And where do you even get PANTS? Do you, like, wear hammer-pants all the time? Or do you need special tripod jeans made?

Or maybe a dress. It's probably easier to not try to fit it in a pant leg at all, amirite?

Yeah, but you gotta take the girth into account. He wraps that around his waist it'll look like he's wearing a life-preserver.

He could rent it out on weekends as a moon-walk for children's parties.

It just seems inconvenient. I mean, everywhere he goes he has to bring along a little red wagon to pull his dick along in.

Don't want it dragging on the pavement, after all. No telling what horrible diseases he could pick up.

Oh please. What horrible diseases could corey possibly pick up when he already has them all?

@combustie: Know what's sad? My internist thinks I have a hernia in my scrote.

Could just be an excuse to fondle your balls some more, though.

I find that ball-fondling test the docs do a bit weird.

@hotrod: that may be just right!

This calls for a twatus?

@MO- I'd guess the same as everyone else: one leg at a time. Only after his pants are on, he makes gold records.