Words of wisdom from my mom.

Me: I had no idea that spending $20k on a college education would be a BAD decision. I worked so fucking hard so that I could get a good job and people would respect me and now I'm applying to minimum wage jobs with teenagers because NO ONE will fucking hire me. I have a degree in forensic anthropology and I might as well use it to wipe my ass.

Mom: Don't say that. You'll have that degree when this is over.

Me: And what if it doesn't end? What if this is only the beginning? I'm really terrified that this is a downward slope to another Great Depression. I'm talking bread lines and shit. Chanel and Devin and I have been STEALING FOOD. That's how fucking poor we are! If I starve to death first, my degree won't do me a fucking bit of good.

Mom: Can I call you back later? I have people waiting for me at the pool and I'm making margaritas.

and i have no words in regards to your mom

liberal arts degrees are so dumb

p.s. try applying for jobs in other states

Shit! This would be an excellent job for me. I am so applying.
http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/ofc/718945800.html
Wish me luck!
David, if get this job you are obligated to ready the welcoming committee.

Pagne and the mystery at Taco Bell

John Gonzales puffed a cigarette, standing in the deserted parking lot of Taco Bell. He glanced at his watch. 4:35. Shit, the garbage men would be here soon. Suddenly a beat up Honda pulled into the lot.

"Pagne?" if this wasn't her, then he was out of a job.
"Yeah, it's me." She locked her car.
"Like I said, my Taco Bell can't exactly afford a CSI team snooping around here, with all of these health code violations. Anyway, I hope you can figure this one out."

He lead her inside. A rat squeaked.

Pagned examined the body. A greasy teenager, Latino. No more than 22.

"You said you just found him like this?"
"Yeah. He was making tacos like normal and then suddenly, the orders started backing up. I went to go see what was up and he was just... like this."

Pagne examined his face. There was bruising all over his face.

"His left mandible is broken and dislocated, but this wouldn't cause a death like this. I'll need to perform an autopsy."

Gonzales was startled.

"An autopsy? When? Where?"
"Here. Now. Do you have a taco knife?"

Pange: If a great depression starts you will have more work! Murder and decay galore!

@Ghostie: The problem is that because if the recession Maricopa County has a hiring freeze on all "non-essential" government employees. And they consider Medical Examiner death investigators to be "non-essential". Well see how non-essential they are when the governor herself is outside in 120 degree heat scraping bodies off the pavement.

Seriously, it's a huge problem. The OME is so understaffed and over-worked that any non-homicide cases are backing up for months. My friend died in January and even though they flagged the case for my benefit, it still took 8 weeks for autopsy results. They even want to get rid of my mentor Dr. Fulgi, who is the ONLY forensic anthropologist employed with the OME. Which means that unidentified cases will literally just go into a storage cabinet indefinitely.